We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
