Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
As shirtless as possible
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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