hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
