At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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