Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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