weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
did i just pee glitter
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
