I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
i now understand why vodka
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
