Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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