sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
