I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
