those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Randomize
