Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
