Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
