Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
She bit a glass in half.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
