I didn't shave. On purpose
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
