This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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