I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
