I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize