He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
try to milk me bitch
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