Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
