You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize
