Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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