They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
