He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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