Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
