i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
