Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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