I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
