it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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