Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
her vagine was all disorganized.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
