i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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