I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize