That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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