I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
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