i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Randomize
