I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
