I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
