If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
