Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
