she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
