mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize