I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
