I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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