I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Panties = found
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
