Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
