Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
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