The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
