can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
