rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
