he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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