If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
