Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
operation harelip BJ is a go
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize
